some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize