I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
