If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize
