are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
