I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
