why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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