i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
wow bdsm is so cute
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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