As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
