She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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