Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
