In the future we'll all be gay
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Randomize
