Everything about him screamed your future.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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