We won't sleep together?
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
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