would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
im calling her cock vulture from now on
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize