Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
