My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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