Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
