I could make wine with my vomit
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize