Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
