We're facebook friends in real life
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
