We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
