He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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