i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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