come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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