What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
