He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
