shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
