8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
