How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
