I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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