Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
