Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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