so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize