found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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