he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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