is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
