And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
