i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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