Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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