kristin has been a bad kristin
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
