you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
