her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
it's like heaven, but drunker
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
