i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
