a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
