She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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