idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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