Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
