we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
as a side note pls kill me
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
