my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
