thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
