Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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