I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
